Trust is never said. It is earned.
I woke up feeling deserted. My friends did. My supposed friends whom I thought would be able to be there when I needed them. I need them now but they're nowhere. I sought consolation to the people I barely know. What's worse, They might actually be the ones who are making my situation worse. This is a hard fought reality that sometimes, people aren't who they are supposed to be. I don't pity them. But I pity myself for choosing the wrong crowd.
But It doesn't end there. Another person, more important than my friends didn't care. She cared more for trivial things. I needed her all this time. She didn't only did nothing... but she did me wrong. I've been a fool all this time. Is she over him? Was she ever over him?
Things could never get worse. I am alone. The door slowly shutting down. Future: I don't see the point why... ***
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Last Kiss
Yesterday.
It was the end of my manic week. I was litterally bitch-slapped by my exams, horrible professors, and obsessive classmates who always try to get the better of me. I had a moratorium against booze. I had to keep my memory intact for my own sake... and for that well coveted prefix if ever ill succeed in this shithole I am into.
The first thing I did was wake up as late as I could. Waking up at 7 wasn't really my idea of late. I was excited to hear that our newbie techy haven't fixed our connection or whatever. In short, NO OFFICE. NO PAY! Crap! But still, I had to make use of the free time.
Don't ask me how I spent it. I spent it wisely. But as we were on our way home, we almost collided with another jeepney. "Kay-uha liko mo pre, bilatsi-iloy ya..." Uttering those word didn't make me feel better. I could almost see myself scalping the face of that asshole who almost delivered my immediate demise.
If that night ended horribly, would that have been our last kiss? By the way, have I told you how I really love you?
It was the end of my manic week. I was litterally bitch-slapped by my exams, horrible professors, and obsessive classmates who always try to get the better of me. I had a moratorium against booze. I had to keep my memory intact for my own sake... and for that well coveted prefix if ever ill succeed in this shithole I am into.
The first thing I did was wake up as late as I could. Waking up at 7 wasn't really my idea of late. I was excited to hear that our newbie techy haven't fixed our connection or whatever. In short, NO OFFICE. NO PAY! Crap! But still, I had to make use of the free time.
Don't ask me how I spent it. I spent it wisely. But as we were on our way home, we almost collided with another jeepney. "Kay-uha liko mo pre, bilatsi-iloy ya..." Uttering those word didn't make me feel better. I could almost see myself scalping the face of that asshole who almost delivered my immediate demise.
If that night ended horribly, would that have been our last kiss? By the way, have I told you how I really love you?
Sunday, September 2, 2007
Afternoon Delights
Promises are for dumb people. Idiots. Stupid.
I promised not to hurt you. I wanted to care. I want to give you the world.
But what do I get in return? I got every inch of doubt. I succumb to pain dealt by you not caring.
I don't need to convince myself that I deserve this. It's TRUE. I deserve to be hurt. I can't get away with karma. Life is not bittersweet. It is bitter to the end. I don't care. I won't care.
...Why do you really have to hurt me? ***
I promised not to hurt you. I wanted to care. I want to give you the world.
But what do I get in return? I got every inch of doubt. I succumb to pain dealt by you not caring.
I don't need to convince myself that I deserve this. It's TRUE. I deserve to be hurt. I can't get away with karma. Life is not bittersweet. It is bitter to the end. I don't care. I won't care.
...Why do you really have to hurt me? ***
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